Domestic Violence .......

OK, so I play this game on myspace called Sorority Life, and there is a lot of discussion today on the subject of domestic violence. Apparently one of the players of the game, was killed last weekend by her husband. Such a tradgedy, and such a waste. I feel so badly for this woman and her children that are left behind to not only morn the death of their mon, but also the loss of their father. I can say for myself, I have never been a victim of this kind of violence, and I thank God for that. And I pray that my daughter never expieriences anything like this ( and I pray that if someone ever harms my daughter, that my husband, son and all of her uncles don't get caught when they try to kill him! LOL) My best friend was a victim of domestice violence, even having miscarriages because of the abuse. But she made it out, and is now happily married to a wonderful man. Thank God for that.

Now this being said, I can say that my real dad was abusive. My mom tells me that he never touched her, or me for that matter. I don't know if it was because she was so strong and he knew that, or maybe that side of him had just not reared its ugly head because they were both young at the time. I can't answer that. But my mom received calls from a woman ( I think she said it was a lady that my dad had married, but I do not remember her at all) who my dad, I guess for a better way to put it, had bet the crap out of her. I also know what my brother has told me about his childhood, in seeing his mom (Debbie) abused. Hes told me stories of hearing screaming from inside the house, only to run in and see our dad straddling his mom while she was on the bed, and our dad holding a gun to her head. My dad was a violent man at one point in his life. He was violent not only in his home, but outside of his home as well. Now as I have said before, we were not involved in each others lives at the time, so his violent tendencies were never an issue for me personally. He had mellowed by the time we met up again, and I loved him because he was my dad. We had our own relationship. I never had to see the bad sides of him, and for that too I am thankful.

I know from stories from my mom, he was severely abused as a child by the man who raised him. She has never gone into details, I don't even know that she knows details, only what she was told by him or his mom. He was not my dads dad, although he was named on the birth certificate (but the boxed is checked as other, not father), and my dad was named after him. My grandmother was already pregnant when she married him, and never said who me dads biological father was to my knowledge. My mom thinks that all of the abuse he received as a child plays a huge part in to how my dad turned out so troubled. And in turn, became so violent himself. I am in no way making excuses for his violent behavior, just trying to understand it myself. Understand how things could have been so different in his life, had it not been for the abuse he received so young.

My brother and I went out to a bar last time we were in Louisiana / East Texas visiting. Of course we had been drinking, and I say to him .... "wow .... wonder what dad is thinking .... both his kids are finally together as brother and sister out partying in a bar!" And he says ...... I know what he is thinking .... "those two went out drinking in a bar and didn't get in a fight with anyone? whats the matter with those two?" Just part of our weird sense of humor! After my grandpa (on my moms side) died last year, my brother and I were hanging out and I told him ..... "If my grandpa didn't make it to heaven, I don't know anyone who will be there. On the other hand, if dad made it to heaven, everyone I know is a shoe in!"

With that being said, take some time to keep all victims of any kind of violence in your thought or your prayers. Do what you can, when you can to help. Donate, volunteer, be a strong shoulder and urge your friends, sisters, moms, loved ones to get out of the situation before it is too late.

hugs to you all !