Happy Friday!!!!!! This afternoon we are going to Victoria to see our friends. Tonight we have quite the busy schedual! There is Sterlings second daughters (Shelby) graduation in Vanderbilt. Its starts at 8, so we have to leave their house no later then 7:15. Thats pushing it! LOL Its 1 1/2 hours to Victoria from our house, and hubs doesn't get home until a little after 5! SO I am trying to get everything ready , and have myself all ready by 5 so that we can just go! Well there is also the graduation of another set of friends daughter, (Congrats Becca) and Amandas (sterlings wife) oldest daughters boyfriend (Comgrats Zack)! Thats in Victoria! Awsome .......
Well as of right now we are playing everything kind of by ear, but we are at this time planning to go to Shelbys graduation, and meet back at Sterling and Amandas for graduation celebrations with the other 2. I dunno! We'll figure it out! I work better most of the time without a plan! Vacations are a blast with me! LOL
Anyway, I will be gone all weekend, so y'all won't hear from me again until Monday! I hope you all have an awesome weekend! Be careful ....... and ENJOY!
Friday, June 5, 2009
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Daughters EX
Ok so I get a phone call yesterday and its my daughters ex boyfriend. This is the same one that calls or text her 15 times a day or more either trying to make her get back with him, telling her how much he loves her, or calling her a bitch. He can go from one extreme to the other. The same one that was almost bordering on stalker, showing up at our next door neighbors hoping she would come out, driving past all the time, swerving to hit her car as she past him on the road (not that I think he was really going to hit her, I think he just did it to freak her out). Anyway, he needed a favor, he needed me to look up some phone numbers for him on the internet. For rehab. He had gone to court, and they told him he had to go to rehab. They gave him a few options of where he could check in. I am hoping and praying he goes and gets straight.
Let me give you a little back history. They had been together 3 1/2 years. And had been through A LOT in those 3 1/2 years. I won't get in to everything, out of respect for my daughter and her life. He in fact at one point ended up moving in with us. One big happy family, odd I know, I have told you we were unconventional. I know, and no one has to tell me that they were young (she is after all only 16 now, he is 18 now). See .... unconventional. But neither I or my husband could turn a blind eye as to what was happening, we are not stupid and were young once as well. We could not stop it from happening, no matter what we said, and would we rather them be sneaking around, in unsafe places? Going to parties, or drives down back roads, or whatever? Anyway, right or wrong ..... he lived with us .... for almost 2 years. His brothers would beat the crap out of him at home, his parents separated, his dad moved in with a girlfirend and he went with him, his mom was on the verge of losing their house, he was angry at her. He blamed her for allowing his brothers to kick his ass all the time (hes much younger then they are), he blamed her for the separation, he has always felt she put him last no matter the situation. Well then his parents got back together and it just turn in to a fiasco, and wallah ......... we ended up with a kid. So anyway .......
Through out the 3 1/2 years, he has always had some issues with drugs. Mostly weed, but there were occasions with other things as well. He has cheated on her, and used drugs often, and she of course, got sick of it. Thats not her style. She is really a pretty good kid. When she had enough, she meant it. He of course now, is regretting all of the past really, REALLY bad decisions he made back then, and has tried getting her back with promises, threats, tears whatever. We had heard he was taking bars (xanax) heavily since he had left. Drinking, heavily since he left. I don't know if its the drugs and alcohol keeping him fixated on her or what, but whatever it is, I am very glad that he is going to rehab. I think it will help fix a lot of his problems. Not only with the drugs, but through the counceling I am hoping he gets clean and can move on to a healthy life. He was and in fact is, like a son to us. Which is part of why this has been so hard on us all as a family.
My daughter is doing well since the breakup. She has a ton a friends now, something he I guess did not want her to have. She loves to go and do things and be active, something someone either high, or hungover, can't seem to find the energy to do. So she is moving on with her life! She laughs more now, and sometimes just acts silly, the way a young girl should. Its things like this that I notice more and more every day. Things that before had faded, and faded so slowly I didn't notice them. But they are coming back into her life now! And I am happy for her.
We are all hoping and praying that he goes on to rehab, sticks it out, and learns new ways of coping with lifes problems. We are truly wishing the best for him!
Let me give you a little back history. They had been together 3 1/2 years. And had been through A LOT in those 3 1/2 years. I won't get in to everything, out of respect for my daughter and her life. He in fact at one point ended up moving in with us. One big happy family, odd I know, I have told you we were unconventional. I know, and no one has to tell me that they were young (she is after all only 16 now, he is 18 now). See .... unconventional. But neither I or my husband could turn a blind eye as to what was happening, we are not stupid and were young once as well. We could not stop it from happening, no matter what we said, and would we rather them be sneaking around, in unsafe places? Going to parties, or drives down back roads, or whatever? Anyway, right or wrong ..... he lived with us .... for almost 2 years. His brothers would beat the crap out of him at home, his parents separated, his dad moved in with a girlfirend and he went with him, his mom was on the verge of losing their house, he was angry at her. He blamed her for allowing his brothers to kick his ass all the time (hes much younger then they are), he blamed her for the separation, he has always felt she put him last no matter the situation. Well then his parents got back together and it just turn in to a fiasco, and wallah ......... we ended up with a kid. So anyway .......
Through out the 3 1/2 years, he has always had some issues with drugs. Mostly weed, but there were occasions with other things as well. He has cheated on her, and used drugs often, and she of course, got sick of it. Thats not her style. She is really a pretty good kid. When she had enough, she meant it. He of course now, is regretting all of the past really, REALLY bad decisions he made back then, and has tried getting her back with promises, threats, tears whatever. We had heard he was taking bars (xanax) heavily since he had left. Drinking, heavily since he left. I don't know if its the drugs and alcohol keeping him fixated on her or what, but whatever it is, I am very glad that he is going to rehab. I think it will help fix a lot of his problems. Not only with the drugs, but through the counceling I am hoping he gets clean and can move on to a healthy life. He was and in fact is, like a son to us. Which is part of why this has been so hard on us all as a family.
My daughter is doing well since the breakup. She has a ton a friends now, something he I guess did not want her to have. She loves to go and do things and be active, something someone either high, or hungover, can't seem to find the energy to do. So she is moving on with her life! She laughs more now, and sometimes just acts silly, the way a young girl should. Its things like this that I notice more and more every day. Things that before had faded, and faded so slowly I didn't notice them. But they are coming back into her life now! And I am happy for her.
We are all hoping and praying that he goes on to rehab, sticks it out, and learns new ways of coping with lifes problems. We are truly wishing the best for him!
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Hunter update. ......
Well, so I know that Itold you all previously that Hunter was Back with Sterling and Amanda (his dad and step mom) and that he was safe and sound. Well That sounds all so wonderful, and too good to be true.
Yesterday morning seemed to start out fine for my friends and her family. At breakfast, Maddie (5) was telling Hunter that Uncle Kelly, Aunt Chrissy and little Manda were coming to see them this weekend (that us by the way .... little Manda is what they call my daughter Amanda, well that or An Tamanda LOL) . And the n she tells him that now that Little Manda brings her own car up, she always takes them someplace fun. Sometimes she take them to Incredible Pizza, sometimes to the movies, but she always tries to take the little ones somewhere. Hunter was so excited! Its the first time he has seen Manda since she got her car, and he asked his mom .. really???? do you think she will take us somewhere this weekend? And Amanda said "I'm sure she will Hunter". Then Hunter asked if they could go eat lunch at Golden Corral ..... his new favorite place to eat. So later that say, Sterling, Amanda, Hunter and Maddie are walking out of the house to go to Golden Corral. Sterling looks up and says, "oh great, theres you mom" to Hunter. Ashley came with the Sheriff Dept.
They were there to pick Hunter up. According to the divorce decree, Sterling can pick him up when school lets out and can have him all summer. Well since Ashley had the paperwork showing he was still supposed to be in her ucstody, the Sheriff had no choice but to let her take Hunter. Now mind you , this whole time Hunter is crying and begging to not have to go with Ashley. When Hunter had no choice but to go with her, he came to Amanda(step mom) and hugged her, and then hugged his dad and made them promise that they would be there to pick him up on Saturday. That is when his dad is supposed to get him anyway.
So needless to say, the 4 of us, me, Kelly, Sterling and Amanda are getting in the car Saturday morning, and driving to Three Rivers, which is the arranged meeting place. If they are not there, we are driving to Crystal City, to try to get him. With us, we will have the report from the sheriff (who said he was making a very detailed report, the crying, the begging, even the part where he told her she had better have him at the meeting place, or that he would file kidnapping charges on her), and the paperwork from the attorney.
I am going to end this blog by saying, I am hoping that Ashley does the right thing. That she meets us the way she is supposed to. That she sends Hunter over to our car unharmed in anyway. And we can take him back to a place where he is safe. If not, and we have to get the police involved, or if she runs with him, this has the potential to get really ugly. I guess I will let you know on Saturday. If theres not a blog from me by Tuesday ..... it means I am still in jail! Start saving your change for my bail!
Yesterday morning seemed to start out fine for my friends and her family. At breakfast, Maddie (5) was telling Hunter that Uncle Kelly, Aunt Chrissy and little Manda were coming to see them this weekend (that us by the way .... little Manda is what they call my daughter Amanda, well that or An Tamanda LOL) . And the n she tells him that now that Little Manda brings her own car up, she always takes them someplace fun. Sometimes she take them to Incredible Pizza, sometimes to the movies, but she always tries to take the little ones somewhere. Hunter was so excited! Its the first time he has seen Manda since she got her car, and he asked his mom .. really???? do you think she will take us somewhere this weekend? And Amanda said "I'm sure she will Hunter". Then Hunter asked if they could go eat lunch at Golden Corral ..... his new favorite place to eat. So later that say, Sterling, Amanda, Hunter and Maddie are walking out of the house to go to Golden Corral. Sterling looks up and says, "oh great, theres you mom" to Hunter. Ashley came with the Sheriff Dept.
They were there to pick Hunter up. According to the divorce decree, Sterling can pick him up when school lets out and can have him all summer. Well since Ashley had the paperwork showing he was still supposed to be in her ucstody, the Sheriff had no choice but to let her take Hunter. Now mind you , this whole time Hunter is crying and begging to not have to go with Ashley. When Hunter had no choice but to go with her, he came to Amanda(step mom) and hugged her, and then hugged his dad and made them promise that they would be there to pick him up on Saturday. That is when his dad is supposed to get him anyway.
So needless to say, the 4 of us, me, Kelly, Sterling and Amanda are getting in the car Saturday morning, and driving to Three Rivers, which is the arranged meeting place. If they are not there, we are driving to Crystal City, to try to get him. With us, we will have the report from the sheriff (who said he was making a very detailed report, the crying, the begging, even the part where he told her she had better have him at the meeting place, or that he would file kidnapping charges on her), and the paperwork from the attorney.
I am going to end this blog by saying, I am hoping that Ashley does the right thing. That she meets us the way she is supposed to. That she sends Hunter over to our car unharmed in anyway. And we can take him back to a place where he is safe. If not, and we have to get the police involved, or if she runs with him, this has the potential to get really ugly. I guess I will let you know on Saturday. If theres not a blog from me by Tuesday ..... it means I am still in jail! Start saving your change for my bail!
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
90th Birthday!
So Sunday we held Kelly's (my husbands) grandmas 90th birthday party. Can imagine .... 90 years! I think about all the changes she has seen our world go through! Its amazing!
We all knew for a week that Kellys mom wanted us to write letters to Grandma, just to let her know how we all feel about grandma. Well of course, anyone who has ever met me ....... ever, knows I am the queen of the last minute! The party was supposed to start around 2 about 35 minutes from our house. So of course here it is 12:30 and I am printing some pictures from grandmas genealogy I had received, typing my husbands letter(he wrote it, but I knew she wanted to actually read it), typing my letter, and then trying to get dressed. So needless to say ..... we were late! Whats new????? LOL
All of her grandkids, except one were there. he lives in Milwaukee, with his wife, and their 2 boys. So none of them were able to be there, but all of the rest of us were. As well as one of her long time best friends , that she grew up with! They had her come down to surprise her!
It was an afternoon filled with laughter, talking, just general hanging out enjoying family time! Just a nice enjoyable, relaxing day! Its so rare that all of us can get all of our different scheduals lined up where all of us can be in one place. Those are the times that we all cherish, and I hope that my kids do as well as they grow up. The times where our family seems more like the Cleavers and less like the Osbournes LOL. Don't get me wrong, I have said before and I stick by this, we may not be the most conventional family out there, but it works for us!
We all knew for a week that Kellys mom wanted us to write letters to Grandma, just to let her know how we all feel about grandma. Well of course, anyone who has ever met me ....... ever, knows I am the queen of the last minute! The party was supposed to start around 2 about 35 minutes from our house. So of course here it is 12:30 and I am printing some pictures from grandmas genealogy I had received, typing my husbands letter(he wrote it, but I knew she wanted to actually read it), typing my letter, and then trying to get dressed. So needless to say ..... we were late! Whats new????? LOL
All of her grandkids, except one were there. he lives in Milwaukee, with his wife, and their 2 boys. So none of them were able to be there, but all of the rest of us were. As well as one of her long time best friends , that she grew up with! They had her come down to surprise her!
It was an afternoon filled with laughter, talking, just general hanging out enjoying family time! Just a nice enjoyable, relaxing day! Its so rare that all of us can get all of our different scheduals lined up where all of us can be in one place. Those are the times that we all cherish, and I hope that my kids do as well as they grow up. The times where our family seems more like the Cleavers and less like the Osbournes LOL. Don't get me wrong, I have said before and I stick by this, we may not be the most conventional family out there, but it works for us!
Monday, June 1, 2009
Domestic Violence .......
OK, so I play this game on myspace called Sorority Life, and there is a lot of discussion today on the subject of domestic violence. Apparently one of the players of the game, was killed last weekend by her husband. Such a tradgedy, and such a waste. I feel so badly for this woman and her children that are left behind to not only morn the death of their mon, but also the loss of their father. I can say for myself, I have never been a victim of this kind of violence, and I thank God for that. And I pray that my daughter never expieriences anything like this ( and I pray that if someone ever harms my daughter, that my husband, son and all of her uncles don't get caught when they try to kill him! LOL) My best friend was a victim of domestice violence, even having miscarriages because of the abuse. But she made it out, and is now happily married to a wonderful man. Thank God for that.
Now this being said, I can say that my real dad was abusive. My mom tells me that he never touched her, or me for that matter. I don't know if it was because she was so strong and he knew that, or maybe that side of him had just not reared its ugly head because they were both young at the time. I can't answer that. But my mom received calls from a woman ( I think she said it was a lady that my dad had married, but I do not remember her at all) who my dad, I guess for a better way to put it, had bet the crap out of her. I also know what my brother has told me about his childhood, in seeing his mom (Debbie) abused. Hes told me stories of hearing screaming from inside the house, only to run in and see our dad straddling his mom while she was on the bed, and our dad holding a gun to her head. My dad was a violent man at one point in his life. He was violent not only in his home, but outside of his home as well. Now as I have said before, we were not involved in each others lives at the time, so his violent tendencies were never an issue for me personally. He had mellowed by the time we met up again, and I loved him because he was my dad. We had our own relationship. I never had to see the bad sides of him, and for that too I am thankful.
I know from stories from my mom, he was severely abused as a child by the man who raised him. She has never gone into details, I don't even know that she knows details, only what she was told by him or his mom. He was not my dads dad, although he was named on the birth certificate (but the boxed is checked as other, not father), and my dad was named after him. My grandmother was already pregnant when she married him, and never said who me dads biological father was to my knowledge. My mom thinks that all of the abuse he received as a child plays a huge part in to how my dad turned out so troubled. And in turn, became so violent himself. I am in no way making excuses for his violent behavior, just trying to understand it myself. Understand how things could have been so different in his life, had it not been for the abuse he received so young.
My brother and I went out to a bar last time we were in Louisiana / East Texas visiting. Of course we had been drinking, and I say to him .... "wow .... wonder what dad is thinking .... both his kids are finally together as brother and sister out partying in a bar!" And he says ...... I know what he is thinking .... "those two went out drinking in a bar and didn't get in a fight with anyone? whats the matter with those two?" Just part of our weird sense of humor! After my grandpa (on my moms side) died last year, my brother and I were hanging out and I told him ..... "If my grandpa didn't make it to heaven, I don't know anyone who will be there. On the other hand, if dad made it to heaven, everyone I know is a shoe in!"
With that being said, take some time to keep all victims of any kind of violence in your thought or your prayers. Do what you can, when you can to help. Donate, volunteer, be a strong shoulder and urge your friends, sisters, moms, loved ones to get out of the situation before it is too late.
hugs to you all !
Now this being said, I can say that my real dad was abusive. My mom tells me that he never touched her, or me for that matter. I don't know if it was because she was so strong and he knew that, or maybe that side of him had just not reared its ugly head because they were both young at the time. I can't answer that. But my mom received calls from a woman ( I think she said it was a lady that my dad had married, but I do not remember her at all) who my dad, I guess for a better way to put it, had bet the crap out of her. I also know what my brother has told me about his childhood, in seeing his mom (Debbie) abused. Hes told me stories of hearing screaming from inside the house, only to run in and see our dad straddling his mom while she was on the bed, and our dad holding a gun to her head. My dad was a violent man at one point in his life. He was violent not only in his home, but outside of his home as well. Now as I have said before, we were not involved in each others lives at the time, so his violent tendencies were never an issue for me personally. He had mellowed by the time we met up again, and I loved him because he was my dad. We had our own relationship. I never had to see the bad sides of him, and for that too I am thankful.
I know from stories from my mom, he was severely abused as a child by the man who raised him. She has never gone into details, I don't even know that she knows details, only what she was told by him or his mom. He was not my dads dad, although he was named on the birth certificate (but the boxed is checked as other, not father), and my dad was named after him. My grandmother was already pregnant when she married him, and never said who me dads biological father was to my knowledge. My mom thinks that all of the abuse he received as a child plays a huge part in to how my dad turned out so troubled. And in turn, became so violent himself. I am in no way making excuses for his violent behavior, just trying to understand it myself. Understand how things could have been so different in his life, had it not been for the abuse he received so young.
My brother and I went out to a bar last time we were in Louisiana / East Texas visiting. Of course we had been drinking, and I say to him .... "wow .... wonder what dad is thinking .... both his kids are finally together as brother and sister out partying in a bar!" And he says ...... I know what he is thinking .... "those two went out drinking in a bar and didn't get in a fight with anyone? whats the matter with those two?" Just part of our weird sense of humor! After my grandpa (on my moms side) died last year, my brother and I were hanging out and I told him ..... "If my grandpa didn't make it to heaven, I don't know anyone who will be there. On the other hand, if dad made it to heaven, everyone I know is a shoe in!"
With that being said, take some time to keep all victims of any kind of violence in your thought or your prayers. Do what you can, when you can to help. Donate, volunteer, be a strong shoulder and urge your friends, sisters, moms, loved ones to get out of the situation before it is too late.
hugs to you all !
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